I'd like to completely ruin four songs for you. May I? The next time you hear them, an image (you didn't want or ask for) will appear in your head. It will burrow into your brain like a earwig -- it may drive you crazy. Or at least make you think.

 

Hi, I'm Vincent Blackwood. I am a junkie.

(Hi, Vincent!)

Yep. I've got a monkey on my back. It could climb the empire state and knock a train off its track. This addiction started so simply -- so innocently.

This is a blog about music and questions. I cover my ass that way when I get off topic -- I always get off topic. I write about music that you probably don't know but should. I write about music that moves me deeply and I can't wait to tell everyone. The world is missing something and what a shame. I may have something else planned, but screw it. I just heard this song and I'm am crazy about it and must tell the world. Or the few people that read my blog.

Sometimes, I am watching someone else's life. We round the corner and there I am. I'm surprised to see me there looking rather foolish and laugh in my face. Turning, I see myself again. It is like a mirror has shattered and I'm everywhere I look. And that really isn't a good thing.

I have only heard a few songs by the Pindrop Symphony (Lauren Benedum). They are raw and immediate like someone alone in the dark at 2 AM. Someone who can't sleep and just has to get it out of their system. Grabbing a piece of paper they sit in the dark writing down what is tearing them apart. I've done that, so has Lauren and here it is. I hope this isn't just a demo but the finished work. One more note would ruin this delicate, barbed wire construction. It is a perfect expression of burnt out obsession. What is left when love is gone but its shadow hasn't.

A lot of people are arguing the merits of the real "I Kissed A Girl" by Jill Sobule verses the other, recent version.  Well let me say it, again, Jill is the best songwriter working today.  I never miss an opportunity to prove that.  Now seems like a grand time to celebrate a hero to nerdy girls and guys everywhere.

Sometimes I hear one song and think -- oh, I just found a new friend. The first track on Marion LoGuidice CD God's House was that song. My friend, Nicole, who seems to have the same pattern of DNA when it comes to what makes us passionate about music, insisted that this may be too female for most guys -- but not for me. Ummm, she meant that as a complement and I took it as a grand one! She said I'm going to get it right away. I did -- first song.

I think too much. I have been thinking about what makes us more than just a thing that uses natural resources, makes waste and eventually dies. What makes us something more?

I was watching a Q and A with TV's David Duchovny. Someone in the audience asked him for his best advice. "Sure," said David, "Listen to the voices in your head."

Everyone laughed since they thought David was calling the guy crazy. "No," Dave continued, "I am being absolutely sincere." He was.

I'm a happy person by nature, yet two years ago depression entered my life and has never really left. Even when I think it is behind me, something will come along and just rip me apart. Suddenly I have no self esteem. I hate myself...I imagine no one cares about me. I am not the person I KNOW I can be. The ghost returns.

Is this a short visit -- or will the ghost unpack and stay for good? If you haven't felt that terror, than no explanation will make you understand. If you suffer from depression no explanation is necessary. You know the ghost.

And We Laughed at the World

Jill Sobule is simply my favorite songwriter. Her songs are witty, emotionally complicated and very personal. Only she could write them; they are handcrafted by someone who cares and is having a blast -- it shows. Real emotions, all natural, no fillers or additives. Can you say that of most of today's wienie whistle music? Look at the label of the cheap hot dogs before you buy them: mechanically separated chicken. OMG. R2D2 tearing a hen to bits as it screams. Nope, Give me my Jill!

Some people you meet and think; Wow, isn't she the smartest person in the room. The way they listen, their knowing smirk as they don't take themselves or anything too seriously. You feel they are way ahead of you -- and it can be fascinating.

Gyrlray is that person, she reminds me of a pixieish version of Winona Ryder, if Winona came from India; half the emotional baggage, all the same great sarcasm.

Pop star Justin Timberlake says he suffers from OCD and ADD, a disorder which makes his life 'complicated'.

I'm sure it took a lot of courage to say that. People can be cruel, insensitive and don't understand. I've suffered from depression and tried to hide it. I felt so guilty and sure that it was all my fault. I was just broken -- and no one would ever understand. No one would ever be able to love me. I was wrong and wasted a good chuck of my life feeling so isolated. I'm happy for you, Justin. I think you will be feeling a little less alone. The healing will begin.